Grimace Birthday Shake

JUNE 19, 2023

I first heard about the Grimace birthday shake from an ad when I was watching hulu && I was a sucker for this idea from the get go. Grimace is cute and this idea is actually very cute - despite being just another evil McDonalds McMarketing ploy.

The flavor of this shake was the the color of this shake — essence of pastel purple. I wanted to love it but,,, I really didnt like it at all. It tasted a little like blueberries, a little like candy and a little like vanilla ice cream, it wasn’t working for me. The taste was an uncanny valley of blueberry smoothie and McDonaldsLandia Purple flavor TM.
Dont get me wrong, I love blueberries,, but the artificial/not so artificial blueberry flavor in the Grimace birthday shake was so out of place to me. Blueberries taste like health and earth and end of summer and this is just not what you come to McDonald’s for. As uninteresting as it would be they would have been better off opting for the obvious, “cake batter flavor” with purple flair.

To be honest with you readers,,, my hope was that the taste of this shake would bring me into the fantasy of what it would feel like to be Grimace’s friend, to be blasted into memory of Grimace’s bowling party or 4th grade sleepover. What does Grimace’s house look like, what would his Birthday cake look like? Where is grimace from? Is it a place with a lot of blueberries???? This shake did not deliver, ther was nothing about this taste that said birthday, or Grimace, I really didn’t find it festive in any way......, it was just kind of puzzling & purple tasting. Perhaps I’m projecting my human ideas birthday flavors on this McMonster,, or maybe I just believe Grimace deserves better...

Despite my dissapointment I do hope Grimace’s numbers are good enough that he gets to have a birthday next year though, HBD Grimace.

Accessibility: McDonald’s is everywhere so its easy to find but the shake costs 6.50 I think? and this seems pretty steep given the product… you could get some high end, organic, sustainable, fairtrade ass ice cream for this price.

Would I recommend: No save your coins

Who should you enjoy this with: idk nobody,,,,, but you should read this book about the history of Mcdonalds and their targetting of black americans in“Franchise; The Golden Arches in Black America” by Marcia Chatelain

This was me: ︎︎

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